The Shadow

With Marianne Hill – Healing The Shadow Practitioner and Trainer

When exploring the shadow we work with the idea that we are all made up of many different parts. Some of these parts we are aware of and happy with, others we are aware of, but they are sides of ourselves we are not happy with, and we’d rather they weren’t there.

In addition to this there are yet other parts of ourselves of which we have almost no awareness at all. They are missing from our conscious knowledge of ourselves and, as a result of these ‘missing’ parts, our experience of life is limited. Furthermore we can suffer much pain and confusion as these hidden aspects run things from the shadows.  Continue Reading

What’s in our Shadow?

With Marianne Hill – Healing The Shadow Practitioner and Trainer

Our shadow contains all the parts of ourselves we have cut off, repressed or denied. These are usually aspects of ourselves that were disapproved of during childhood, or that we needed to hide in order to gain affection. They are characteristics that it might have been counterproductive or dangerous for us to express. In childhood our psychological and physical survival depends on getting along with those around us and being accepted, so we very naturally hide sides of ourselves that may not serve us in this process.  Continue Reading

Diversity From The Inside Out

An article by Marianne Hill – Healing The Shadow Practitioner and Trainer

In this article I will explore the idea that diversity is, at core, about more than just accepting and welcoming ’other’. It is, first and foremost, about accepting and welcoming parts of ourselves – parts that we haven’t yet had a chance to meet.
Firstly I am going to introduce you to a belief that has influenced me for a long time now and underpins all the work that I do. You will need to bear with me for a while as I take you through my own personal journey to arriving at this understanding – via shamanism, poetry, quantum physics, group dynamics and the other varied influences that have informed this belief.

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Does Positivity Bring Joy?

An article by Marianne Hill – Healing The Shadow Practitioner and Trainer

People look to many different things to bring them joy – money, status, a beautiful place to live, the perfect partner, children, friends…. . However many of us also have a sense that it is a person’s way of being – who or how they are – that has a greater influence on their happiness than the people or things around them. Continue Reading

The Things We Do For Love

An article by Marianne Hill – Healing The Shadow Practitioner and Trainer

Our Need For Connection

When exploring love and intimacy I look to the ‘Lover’ archetype, which is representative of our need for connection. The need of our inner Lover to connect – to bond with other human beings, with ourselves, with nature and with spirit, is the most fundamental and the most powerful drive we have as human beings. There are well documented examples that demonstrate that humans and many other mammals place connection above food and physical wellbeing – sometimes even above their own survival. Continue Reading

Meeting Our Shadow Predator

An article by Marianne Hill – Healing The Shadow Practitioner and Trainer

When I’m exploring the shadow with a client I speak to the many different parts of that person that make up the whole. Here I’d like to introduce you to a particularly unsettling type of part that I sometimes come across – an internal shadow predator.

We all have many different parts, each with different points of view, different ideas about our life and different feelings. Some of them carry very strong energy and emotion.

Everyone is different and all their parts are unique and have their own flavour and character. In Healing The Shadow work one of our aims is to get all of these different parts working together. They are all of value in some way and a necessary part of the whole. When all our different parts work together towards the same goal life can feel much more harmonious and have a greater sense of flow.

However…., sometimes when we’re doing this work we come across a part of us that seems to be completely destructive.

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How Can I Know What’s In Shadow For Me?

An article by Marianne Hill – Healing The Shadow Practitioner and Trainer

Our shadow, by its very nature, is out of our sight. Either it is completely unconscious or it is right out on the periphery of our consciousness. The shadow consists of parts of us we have hidden away and are trying hard not to see. One way of thinking of this is to imagine that we have a bag which we drag along behind us, and in this bag we have hidden away all the parts of ourselves that we don’t want to show to the world – the parts we have cut off, repressed or denied. This bag forms our shadow. We can’t see it, and we hope against hope that others can’t see it either. Continue Reading

Addictive behaviour and the Connection Shadow

An article by Marianne Hill – Healing The Shadow Practitioner and Trainer

Disconnection

London, 1992. I found myself alone, with a young baby, in a big city I didn’t know, teaching science in a tough Comprehensive. Life was hard, I was out of my depth and lonely. I needed help. The doctor suggested a counsellor. She cost £30 an hour. A bottle of wine at the time was about £7. Being on a very tight budget it didn’t take me long to decide that alcohol was going to be the best way to get some regular respite from my overwhelm and exhaustion… I could afford to have a glass of wine 7 nights a week rather than support for 1 hour a week. Also, my counsellor didn’t quite seem to be giving me the kind of support I needed, although I couldn’t work out what was missing… Continue Reading

Examining our Fears and Fantasies

An article by Marianne Hill – Healing The Shadow Practitioner and Trainer.

This is the last in a series of five posts about communication. When I teach communication I use the 5 Fields authentic communication framework which requires 5 different aspects to be communicated. These are:

Facts What actually happened

Fears and Fantasies What we imagine or believe about what happened

Feelings How we feel about what happened

Fortress What is not ok for us. Where we need to protect ourselves

Forward From Here What we want from the other person in the future Continue Reading

Communicating our boundaries

An article by Marianne Hill – Healing The Shadow Practitioner and Trainer

In the previous 3 communication blogs we have explored communication of the facts, our fears and fantasies, our feelings and how to move forward from here. Here we complete the picture by exploring the value of expressing our boundary. We call this section our fortress. This is where we protect and defend ourselves from experiences that cause us pain or difficulty. Continue Reading